Glow Living

Category: For Men

  • What do you “deserve”?

    What do you “deserve”?

    Today’s topic is something that holds a lot of people back, especially creatives, and its about the need to raise our standards for what we think we “deserve”. If you have thoughts or reactions that keep you from the things you aspire to, its likely because you don’t think you deserve the outcome deep down.

    Our brains manufacture reasons why we don’t deserve to attract the things we want. They tell us we need more training, we need to lose weight, we aren’t attractive enough, there are people better than us, etc. 

    We can always find people who are seemingly better looking, more successful, more credentialed, and the like. Does that mean we are less worthy to attract the things we want? I don’t think so.

    What it does mean is that we’ve given ourselves justification for not deserving it…and, subsequently, not going for it. Like last week’s theme about not feeling good enough, our brain serves up these road blocks to keep us right where we are, safe and sound.

    Additionally, parents, partners, bosses and other people can reinforce these beliefs because of their own insecurities, whether they knowingly do it or not. Regardless, as adults now, its time to decide on the standards to enforce in our lives. I invite you to raise them from wherever they are right now.

    It’s NEVER a bad thing to RAISE YOUR STANDARDS. Quote me on that! 

    I believe we deserve to attract the things we want simply because we exist and want them. We can help ourselves manifest our desires when we uphold high standards with ourselves and others; take proactive steps towards meeting our goals; and strive to be the best versions of ourselves. 

    In what areas do you think you can raise your standards? What would it take to commit to it and start upholding them? How will it help you meet your goals? What are the costs if you don’t do it?

     

  • Allow People to Align With Your Truth

    Allow People to Align With Your Truth

    The Meme of the Week is “Allow People to Align With Your Truth,” and thought I’d explain what I mean by this. It all starts with aligning to yourself first, meaning acknowledging what you want and need to be happy and fulfilled. Knowing your truth will help you communicate it to those around you so that you can attract the support you need to create a new vision.

    Glowliving_11There are times when we identify something in our lives that isn’t working for us, such as a job or an aspect of a relationship. When this happens, its critical that we prioritize making important changes in these areas so that we can grow and avoid feeling stuck or held back in life. People hold themselves back for a variety of reasons including worrying about what others may think or feeling that they aren’t worthy enough to get what they want. However, holding yourself back will only prove to increase dissatisfaction and reduce levels of fulfillment over time which can lead to bigger problems. 

    You may find yourself less satisfied with your career, and want to go to the next level or jump tracks to another career. This may mean changing your identity and having others accept the new you. Recognizing that a career change is necessary to live your truth takes courage to put into action, and communication to help people understand the significance of supporting you through such big changes. 

    In a relationship, being truthful about your dissatisfaction or need for change can create anxiety about how the other person may respond. This can lead to concerns about consequences related to expressing your needs, and worry that it could lead to anger or abandonment. These consequences may in fact be very real, however, there are consequences for not communicating your needs as well. If our needs are not met over time, it’s easy get depressed and allow resentments to build up. When deep resentments start to weigh down a relationship, its often the kiss of death and you may have to say goodbye any way.

    You may avoid this by giving your partner a chance to align with your truth by letting them know where you really stand. The ball is in their court as to how they react. How they respond will show you how true they are to you and indicate their commitment to supporting and serving your needs at the highest levels. This is what true partnership is about. We grow and change and need partners that are flexible enough to realign while continuing to hold our hands as we walk the same path.

    Standing in your truth shows respect for yourself and demonstrates that you are upholding high standards. It’s always a good thing to have high standards. This is at the core of my advice to people in many situations. Take the high road and give others the opportunity to align to your truth. If they don’t, they may not be ready for reasons that may not have anything to do with you and everything to do with their willingness to grow and to be open to change.

    If you hide your true feelings or project a false self, they will think they are aligning with the true you, and can feel betrayed if you break up under pretenses of which they were unaware. Additionally, you will never have the chance to see if they were capable of making the adjustments necessary to preserve the relationship.

    Consider starting with recognizing and accepting your own truth about what you need and want in your life, then give those around you the opportunity to align and support you. If they don’t, its their loss, and if they do, you win! Either way, you can rest in a deep assurance that you are following what’s true to you and in your heart.