Why We Get Stuck and How to Get Unstuck
I recently attended Gabby Bernstein’s book launch event at Grace Cathedral in San Francisco. At the end, people lined up to ask her questions. It was fascinating to hear what they needed. Most wanted to share a life problem and ask for advice on how to get unstuck.
Listening to them made me think about where I feel stuck in my own life—and how I might help others move forward.
Common Reasons We Get Stuck
We get stuck for many reasons, but three stand out the most:
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We can’t see the forest through the trees. Sometimes we need an outside perspective to help us see our situation more clearly.
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It’s scary to change. Even if our current situation isn’t ideal, it may serve us in some way. In addition, we fear the unknown. What if change makes things worse?
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We’re in a double bind. This means we feel “damned if we do, damned if we don’t,” which can make any decision feel impossible.
Techniques to Get Unstuck
Here are six strategies you can try to break free:
1. Face the Fear of Change
Play out the fear all the way to the worst-case scenario. Then ask yourself—Is it really that bad? Can anything good come from it? If you find some positives, move toward them. Even a small step forward can boost your courage and create momentum.
2. Look at the Cost of Staying Stuck
Consider what happens if nothing changes. Who might get hurt? How bad could it get? Sometimes we can tolerate our own dissatisfaction, but what if staying stuck impacts someone you love? As a result, recognizing the ripple effect may give you the push to act.
3. Listen to Someone Who Loves You
Imagine what a person who truly wants the best for you would say. Often, we treat ourselves less kindly than we treat others. Therefore, hearing that supportive voice—whether real or imagined—can guide you toward a healthier choice.
4. Examine How Your Situation Meets Your Needs
Even difficult situations can meet emotional needs—just at low levels. Because of that, we often settle for “good enough” instead of going after what truly fulfills us. However, raising your standards almost always leads to growth, for yourself and others.
5. Commit to Growth
If you believe that “if you’re not growing, you’re dying (inside),” then challenge yourself to try something new. You may feel afraid, yet you can always adjust later. In addition, taking action builds confidence, regardless of the outcome.
6. Look for the Life Lesson
Ask yourself if this situation holds a lesson you’re ready to learn. If you delay making a choice, the Universe often makes it for you—and that can be much harder. Problems tend to repeat until we face them head-on. As a result, choosing your own path often gives you more control and peace of mind.
Final Thoughts on Getting Unstuck
Being stuck can feel heavy, frustrating, and lonely. However, you have more tools and choices than you may realize. By exploring these strategies, you can move toward a life that feels authentic and aligned.
About the Author:
Chandra Lynn is a certified transformation coach, speaker, and founder of Glow Living. She’s the author of Root-to-Rise: How to Love Life, a soulful personal growth guide to help people navigate emotional hurdles, life transitions, and personal reinvention. Through her coaching programs and writing, she empowers women to reconnect with their authentic selves and rise with purpose.
