Are you scared to be vulnerable? I am. I never thought I was though. I live open-heartedly which means I’m generally open and authentic in all aspects of my life. However, these last few months I’ve gone into hiding because of being afraid to expose myself during hard times.
As a coach, I want to be an inspirational leader and a rock for the people around me. However, as I’ve felt challenged with what I want in my relationships and career, I found myself living small. It’s been hard to focus and live out loud. My goals have barely been worked on, and certainly not getting met. It’s been more about getting by than getting where I need to go.
The first thing to go was the Glow Living newsletter. Why? Because I didn’t feel good about doing it inauthentically. I’d rather not send it then to send something that is generic.
While reading Daring Greatly by the fabulous Dr. Brene Brown, I discovered right away that the reason for my lack of momentum with Glow Living has been because of how hard it is for me to deal with difficult topics when I am personally feeling vulnerable about them. I can talk all day long about topics that aren’t currently affecting me, but we are mirrors to each other and I started to find it hard to show up for the reflections in a public forum.
The more I talk about my experiences with vulnerability, the more I realize its an epidemic that is truly holding people back.
For example in relationships, if you feel like you crave connection with your partner and can’t seem to achieve the intimacy you deeply desire, I’d bet my house that its because one or both of you has a hard time being truly vulnerable.
What is there really to be afraid of? Is it that if we show vulnerability, the people we care about wont like or respect us? That they’ll criticize or leave us? That we’ll look weak and undesirable for communicating our fears and deep feelings?
The truth is that showing vulnerability demonstrates emotional strength, maturity and self-esteem. And, its actually attractive because people love authenticity. The thing we are scared of showing about ourselves is often the very thing that makes people fall in love with us!
I venture to say that if we are truly vulnerable with the people we love and they reject us that THEY are the ones that aren’t worthy! I know it doesn’t feel like its worth the risk, but isn’t it worth knowing who is really there for you and still standing after looking straight into your heart and soul?
I’m not done with Brene Brown’s research and certainly don’t have it all figured out so I ask you to join me and share your experiences. Maybe we can start with seeing GlowLiving.com as a safe place for showing vulnerability with each other and see where it goes.